Bob's Burgers Oneshots
by blagra1679
Summary: Hello fans of the great show called Bob's Burgers. These are a series of various Oneshots ranging from angst to comedy. They contain shorts starring all of your favorite characters! Warning: This will contain obsessive shipping! I also accept requests and suggestions from all you readers. These shorts will range from K to T. Check out my DA page as blagra1679 : 4 CHAPTERS SO FAR!
1. No More

**Bold** =Author's Note

 _Italics_ =Thoughts

* * *

 **Ok, first of all, I apologize in advance for this. With that out of the way lets get to the big stuff. This is a**

 **Bob's Burger fan fiction featuring Louise. It's an attempt at angst which is not my forte, so I'd love to get**

 **advice from you pros out there. It's kind of implied that Louise is a bit older than she is in the show and I**

 **think you can figure out the rest. I obviously don't own Bob's Burgers (thankfully for you). It's very short**

 **because I am a lazy bum and can't do anything better (yet, I hope).**

* * *

I punched the bag. The flashes of memories wouldn't stop. The memories of the accident. The memories

of the burning and the screaming. The memories of sobbing and hopelessness. The memories of- no! No

more memories!

I punched the bag. _No more! No more! No more! No more!_ I repeated like a mantra as I hit the bag again

and again and again.

My knuckles bled but I didn't care. I liked the pain, it helped me forget. Forget the sleepless nights. Forget

the drawn faces. Insincere faces. Faces pasted with sympathy and pity. They know nothing. Besides, nothing

could compare with the pain I already felt.

I continued to hit the bag. Red blood, my blood, smeared its surface and covered my hands. Sweat

dripped down my brow and I wiped it away with my bleeding knuckles.

Automatically I pulled my ears farther down on my head. My ears. The ones he had given me. That's when

the tears began to stream down my face. I tore off my ears and flung them across the room.

Sinking to my knees sobs wracked my small frame. I could taste the salty sweat and tears on my lips and

the snot running from nose.

I needed to get up. If I didn't get up now, I never would. _Maybe that's OK_ , a small part of me thought.

Maybe I should just let myself shrivel away here. In this dark basement.

No. Stop. No tears. I had no time for tears.

I lurched to my feet. Staggering, I leaned against the wall for support. _No more_. I pulled back my fist. _No_

 _more pain_. I punched the wall. _No more hopelessness_. Sharp white-hot agony spread up my arm. _No more_

 _sadness_. My fingers were bent in different directions. _No more memories_. Blackness tainted the edges of my

vision. I heard footsteps running down the stairs. "No more." I whispered. Then the blessed blackness came.

* * *

 **Man! I wish I didn't repeat "bag" so many times :(**


	2. The Sky is Up

**Hello everyone! So you thought I would spare you, you thought that it couldn't possibly get any worse,**

 **well...**

 **DUNDUNDUN!**

 **SECOND ONESHOT!**

 **Mwahahahaha**

 **A Zina or Teke Oneshot were Zeke tries to build up his nerve to ask her out, emphasize of TRIES! More of a**

 **comical Oneshot instead of angsty**

 **Welp, enjoy!**

* * *

He looked across the halls, through the sea of people.

Glancing around nervously, he wiped his sweaty palms on his dark brown shorts. He scanned the crowd

again.

Suddenly he heard a bang and a monotoned "Yes!" There she was. Her beaten up locker stood open with her

books splayed out on the floor. She leaned down, her dark short-cut hair swooping across her face. It was

Tina Belcher. The dorky, socially awkward, absolutely gorgeous teenager that had caught his attention ever

since he'd first laid eyes on her. The girl who had always been too busy pining for his best friend to notice

that there was someone else that liked her more than anything.

 _Ok..._ He thought. _You can do this. She's just a girl right? No biggie? SHE'S NOT JUST A GIRL!_ His mind

screamed back at him. Before he could chicken out Zeke stumbled up to Tina.

"H-hey girl!" he stammered.

She looked over and gave a low moan. "Zeke." she huffed and went back to struggling with the door of her

stubborn locker.

 _Not the best start._ Zeke thought. _Maybe this was a bad idea...NO! He was going to do this!_ Zeke took a deep

breath and collected his thoughts. "What's up?" He said more confidently this time.

"The sky." Tina said without even looking at him.

Zeke winced. _You can do this._ "So T, I was think'in that maybe..." He stammered "...I mean if yah wanna..."

She looked over at him. _Damn! Those big brown eyes made him freeze up every time._ "...maybe me and you

could-" he started to say when suddenly there was a loud crash and students started screaming.

He saw a flash of pink ears and a "Come on Tina!" and then she was gone.

Shockingly he was unsurprised. Another one of the Belcher's crazy adventures he assumed.

With a deep sigh Zeke turned around and began to trudge to class. _Dammit_.

Behind him an enraged Mr. Frond yelled, "LOUISE!"


	3. Reader POV

**Yo! This is another Oneshot, but from the reader's point of view. Remember to rate and review!**

* * *

I looked up at the sign of a small restaurant crammed between a Crematorium and a For-Rent store. It was called Bob's Burgers.

 _Mmm... seems decent enough._

The bell jingled as I pushed open the door and walked inside.

Looking around I saw an empty restaurant.

Wait, scratch that, an almost empty restaurant.

There were two men inside.

One was a fat, unshaven, man perched on one of the bent rusted stools. He was digging into a burger with almost frenzied energy.

Behind him there was a pale, thin, man wearing what seemed to be a toupee. He appeared to be talking to someone from through

a small window, the cook perhaps.

I heard a noise to my left and spotted a chubby boy wearing a light yellow shirt being chased by a little girl wearing a green dress

and pink bunny ears.

She held two bottles of ketchup and was attempting to squirt the little boy.

As he ran he looked over his shoulder and yelled "Missed me!"

I almost smiled but then I realized he was heading straight towards me. I had barely enough time to widen my eyes in shock before

he hit me head first.

I let out a whoof and collapsed.

"Gene!" I heard a voice yell.

Footsteps ran up to where I lay sprawled on the floor and then I saw someone standing over me.

I tried to get my eyes to focus but I was seeing double.

"Oh my God!" I heard the man say and then a deeper monotoned voice spoke, "Is she dead?"

"I'll go get my chalk!" another voice butted in excitedly.

"She's not dead!" said the man.

By now my vision had cleared enough so that I could make out his appearance.

He was wearing an apron and holding a spatula in his hand like I was a bug and he was going to try and squash me.

Opening my mouth I tried to say "What?" but it came out as a wheeze instead.

Suddenly there was a larger shape in front of my face. It was the boy that had barreled into me.

"Are you dead?" He asked.

I would have laughed had my lungs not felt like deflated balloons.

"Gene! Get away from her!" The cook yelled.

 _So_ _that_ _was_ _his_ _name..._ I thought.

"Ughh..." I moaned and sat up, pushing Gene away from my face.

I struggled to get down air.

"Whoohoo! She's not dead!" sang Gene excitedly as he danced around in a circle.

"Dammit." I heard the little girl mutter.

"I am so sorry!" I looked back over at the cook who was eying me with a worried expression. "Are you Ok?"

"Y-yeah!" I gasped out a reply.

I staggered to my feet and leaned against the yellow counter.

"J- just out of b-breath!" I wheezed, clutching at my stomach.

"I know what will make you feel better!" Gene yelled in my ear.

He pulled a blue keyboard from out of nowhere and started pressing keys. Different kinds of farts blasted my eardrums.

I winced and leaned away from him.

"Gene! Stop it!" the cook yelled and started wrestling him for the keyboard.

"Hey you!" I looked down wearily.

Staring up at me was the little girl I had seen earlier.

"I'm Louise. I just want to ask you a few questions..." She started to list a dozen questions all at once.

All the noise.

I couldn't take it anymore!

I pushed past the the little girl and through the door.

Taking a big gulp of air I practically ran across the street to a place called Jimmy Pestos.

 _I'll_ _settle_ _for_ _pizza_.


	4. Memory

**Bold** =Author's Note

 _Italics_ =Thoughts

* * *

 **Warning: This is not the easiest ship for me to write but here you go. As requested, it is an older version**

 **of LouBoo where Louise is 14 and BooBoo (or now known as Brayden) is 15. That is going off of the assumption that**

 **BooB** **oo is one year older than Louise. Secondly, Brayden is not actually addressed in the show itself, it is a fan name**

 **that I chose myself because I thought it would work better for this story.**

 **Finally if we have any artists out there who want to draw anything from this fanfic, feel free to! Just please attach a**

 **link to this story or give me credit for the design. You can also send me a link to it so I can check out your cool art.**

* * *

BooBoo walked down the street, kicking pieces of trash off the sidewalk.

Although now, he went by Brayden, his birth name. He decided to change it back ever since he dropped out of the

music business.

It wasn't the only thing that changed either. His hair was roughly cut now and swooped down his neck and face. A

major growth spurt had also made him tall and gangly.

Brayden sighed, " _Where did it all go wrong._ "

Ever since he turned 15 his life had gone downhill. Puberty had not been kind to his voice. It turned from sweet and

smooth to cracked and broken. No one wanted to listen to that.

At first him and the other guys in Boyz 4 Now tried using auto tune, but then there was the Kentucky Derby

Scandal...and Brayden knew it just wasn't going to work out. So he called it quits and pursued other options.

Now, if that had been the end then he would have been fine. Brayden still had the money left over from his short

career and even if he hadn't pursued something else he probably could have floated on that reservoir for at least 50

years or so had there not have been that fire that burned down the hotel he was staying at.

Luckily he escaped alive and relatively unscathed.

This was not the same for his profits which he had been unfortunately storing with him. It was all destroyed.

That's not to say he was broke by any means, he had a fantastic insurance plan, but it didn't cover nearly enough of

the damages.

That's how he had ended up here, in New Jersey at a run-down

town centered around an old amusement park called

Wonder Wharf.

Brayden was so caught up in his reminiscing that he had completely lost track of time. It was half past three and he

was starving.

" _Where am I?_ " He wondered looking around.

Ocean Avenue was printed on a faded sign near the end of the block.

" _Maybe there's someplace to eat around here..._ " Brayden thought as he wandered down the street.

Up ahead he saw two restaurants.

One was a pizza parlor that seemed packed to the brim. He could hear a barrage of voices, audio speakers, and oddly

enough a man screaming "Shut up Jimmy Pesto!".

Brayden didn't really feel up to being around a bunch of people right now.

He looked over at the other restaurant.

It seemed relatively empty with perhaps one or two customers by the look of it.

" _The burger joint it is!_ " He thought to himself and stepped up to the door pushing it open.

A bell dinged as he walked inside.

He looked around to see if there was a server. _Nothing_. That's when he noticed a pair of pink tattered ears poking

from above the faded yellow counter.

" _Now why does that seem so familiar?_ " Brayden pondered.

He looked over the table and saw a girl, about his age maybe, scrubbing away at a large brown stain on the floor. She

obviously hadn't heard him enter the establishment.

Brayden nearly gasped.

It was that girl from about 3 years ago that had stowed away in the Boyz 4 Now van during a concert along with

another girl, her sister, who had been much older.

She had obviously been smitten with him, like many girls, but when he tried to talk to her, she had slapped him.

" _What was her name..._ " he pressed his brain for the memory. " _Louise! That was it!_ "

She had changed too. Gone was the little girl with the green dress and pigtails. Now she was a fourteen year old

teenager that had matured in more ways than one.

Her hair was now held back in a single long ponytail that nearly reached her waist. She wore a simple green tank and

some fitted black jeans, and Brayden had to admit, they looked good on her.

He cleared his throat to catch her attention.

Startled Louise jumped up to face him. Their faces were mere inches away from each other.

Awkwardly Brayden pulled away blushing.

" _Wait? Why am I blushing?_ " He scolded himself. " _This girl had a crush on me years ago, literally! I've had hundreds of_

 _girls screaming my name and asking me to marry them, why is this making me embarrassed!_ "

"Hello?" Brayden heard a voice ask.

"Huh?" He said coming out of his stupor.

"Are you going to order or are you just going to stand there?" Louise asked annoyed.

"Oh yeah! Sorry!" Brayden stammered flustered.

"Wait a second..." Louise said squinting at him. "Aren't you BooBoo? The old Boyz 4 Now guy?"

"Errr...yeah..." Brayden responded, "But I go by the name Brayden now."

"Oh sure!" She said leaning on the counter with both arms underneath her. "So, what are you doing in this trash

heap?" Louise exclaimed, gesturing around the restaurant. "I mean, the only celebrity we've seen here is that dude

from the Hawk and Chick movies."

"Well, I guess I just felt in the mood for a burger and this happened to be in the area." Brayden replied truthfully.

"Plus, I'm not really considered a celebrity anymore."

"Whatever." Louise said. "Anyways, you'll get your burger once the cook comes back from screaming at Jimmy Pesto

across the street."

" _So that's who I heard yelling..._ " Brayden thought.

"Well, I fine with waiting." He said cheerily.

" _More than fine._ " he thought to himself smugly. _This was going to be fun._

* * *

 **Yo, so as an after note, I know that this one was short but again; LouBoo is not my forte. I may continue this with a**

 **part two if I can think of a good way to finish it, but no promises. Feel free to correct any of my spelling or grammar**

 **errors but please, be nice. Also remember to check out my stories and art on my DA account also under the name blagra1679.**


	5. Author's Note

Hello everyone!

Sorry for being so inactive recently, I've been in a funk and couldn't get any good ideas. It also been a kinda weird

week for me so that also got in the way. I'm really busy this summer. I am NOT abandoning this story and I will try to

get my requests done as soon as possible! Thanks for understanding, bye!

-Jelly


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